So the second week of our holidays have been very different….. as close to happiness as this old family gets I’d say. There have been plenty of arguments, and plenty of nasty moments, but generally it’s been a relaxed, beautiful experience abroad…. Thank goodness. Life over here is very chilled out. The house we’re staying in is a beautiful double storey Texan home on around 90 acres. There is a two storey playhouse with a flying fox coming off it, a horse called Tony that just wanders freely around the yard including up to the wrap around verandah where you might be sitting and having a bevvie, and he doesn’t mind the kids just jumping on his back saddle free for a little walk around the yard. It’s a good ten miles to a shop and closer to twenty minutes to the main town. It’s serenity at it’s best…… just what the Dr would prescribe I guess. Sometimes the pain that I see in the girls shows more when there is no reason at all for their cracks to be showing…… If there is no reason why they should be not coping, and we’re seemingly having the best time, then I can see clearer where it comes from. Last night Rubes and I ended up in an almighty blow out. The late nights have caught up with her and her snappiness and anxiety issues are harder and harder to hide. Being in a household with two other young girls’ means that there are usually two against two…. Her competitive nature comes screaming out, and it starts continuous wars. It’s frustrating and exhausting as hell being the parent of the kid that is constantly making issues where issues don’t need to be made. I don’t agree with her 90% of the time and she is fully aware of this….. This causes issues in itself. It makes me seem like I never take her side, and to a kid with one parent at home, that must be awful. But I can’t bullshit her either. How will she ever learn right from wrong, or what is socially acceptable and what is not? I know the Aspergers will sometimes make it impossible for her to see these things without being reminded…. but surely if she listened enough she might just remember what is okay and what is not?? The problem is that she doesn’t ever listen, because in her head she already knows the answers to life….. she knows what to say, what to not say, when to pipe up, when to not…. of course we all know that this is bullshit. She certainly doesn’t know when to stop….. she must have the last word. At any cost. So the last few days here have slowly become a little more uncomfortable and a little more uncomfortable between the kids… luckily my mate is a high school teacher. She has handled it very well. As have her gorgeous girls…… Today we head to the big smoke to buy the girls some cowboy boots, I am hoping that we can diffuse the situation…. We have had an incredible time, and we have well and truly fallen in love with Texas…. for me, it’s the second time. I’m just glad that with all these issues we have, it doesn’t stop us from travelling the world and sucking it dry for what it has to offer us….. We are all so grateful that we are still here to enjoy it.
See y’all soon. xxxx
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